Everyday with Ed

I get a lot of inspiration for posts from listening to my pod casts. This morning I was listening to Dr. Phil interview Mitch Albom about various books he has written, Tuesdays with Morrie is one of them. Mitch himself suffered a loss and he discusses that in the podcast. He speaks about how utterly helpless he felt holding his daughter as she took her last breath. That really hit home this morning.

I lost my Ed to pancreatic cancer on my birthday, which is coming up. The next few weeks have always been very hard and now I think I understand why it will always be very hard. Mitch hit the nail right on the head. Everything in our brains tell us that there was not a thing we could do to change the inevitable, but we have this horrible feeling that can not be shaken that we did not do enough. There had to something else that we could have done. Re running the last few months over and over in our heads on what we could have done better.

Four years later, I know now that Ed’s passing is why I am riding again. Do not wait for the opportune time to do what you love. Do it now!!! Enjoy it now. Take those trips you have dreamed about. No more procrastinating. Someone else is not going to schedule it for you.

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What is in it for you?

What is your payoff? Why have you made the goals you have? So, I am going to be upfront and honest. I am taking this straight from Living by Design by Dr. Phil. What does success in your life look like for you? I’m going to keep this focused first on my riding success. Why am I doing all this? What is my payoff? The choices are as follows:

Monetary – Psychological – Spiritual – Physical – Achievement – Social

I am getting into the best shape of my life so that I can achieve my equestrian goals. It has nothing to do with money or spirituality. It will aid in my psychological make up. The journey and then finally feeling like I have attained this goal will be probably the biggest boost to my psychological self. Social? Hmmm? Will achieving this goal change my social behavior. Haven’t really thought it through. I hope not actually. I hope it doesn’t go to my head and I become something I do not want to become. Bottom line, for me, it is all about achieving something that I have always dreamed of – Finally.

Next blog I’m going to examine this same “What’s in it for me” regarding my choice of employment.

Fat Girl In A Little Suit

This day was cross country schooling. For cross country schooling you are required to wear a protective vest. This particular vest was borrowed and I let the strings all the way out. I don’t really think you can call it a vest actually. It fit me more like a Brar. Such a lovely pic with my belly hanging out of the bottom. Our equestrian world is such a loving tight nit community, however, not one person laughed. Instead, I was told how lovely my posture was and how good of a seat I had on Tally.

I, however, decided from this point on that 2019 was going to be my year. I have been listening to Dr. Phil’s “Phil in the blanks” podcast and he really hit the nail on the head. I will do my best to quote what I heard and how it struck me. He said that if you are not completely satisfied with the way you feel then you need to put yourself on project status. Project status is you are selling your home and the garage needs to be painted for a showing on Saturday. That is project status, your new priority. There are 4 ways of being put on project status:

  1. You have been court ordered to do something. You changing will not last because you have been forced to.
  2. Your family wants you to change so you try to please them.
  3. You know in your mind that changing is really what you need to do for better health or for extending your life. Still not feeling it.
  4. When you are mentally ready. This is when real change will happen. You are looking yourself in the mirror and say I will not take this any more!! Not another minute, not another hour, not another day!!